Happiness - an inside job

“I was knocking at the door of happiness all my life. When the door opened, I realized that I was knocking from the inside.” RUMI

Happiness has historically been either short-lived or elusive - at least so it was for me till I realized that it is a state of the mind that comes from  ‘Sharing  &  Giving’‚  although  we  are under the illusion that it comes from ‘Getting  &  Consuming‘  &  collecting  material  things.  I have now realized that there is no way to Happiness, Happiness is the way and it starts  from the inside. It is a path, a journey, not a goal  or a destination. It is an Inside job.

The famous Urdu poet Mirza Ghalib once wrote “I  have  made  my  life  Happier.  I  have  asked some people to forgive me and others I have forgiven“. It is so simple, but to do it we need to rid ourselves of the Ego. I tried for a long time to be free and happy as the Ego, till I realized that I have to be free from the Ego, not free as the Ego. It’s maybe a subtle difference in words, but the real difference is like a stormy moonless night and a tropical sunny day. :)

The other thing I realized is that the challenges in my life that threw me out of my comfort zone, were the times when I was able to really grow as a Human Being. I now know that the Universe  always  gives  me  what  I  need,  not necessarily what I want. So, I now feel that I don’t need to be unhappy with what I really need, even if it may not be what I want at that point in time.

On  a  more  basic  level,  I  have  seen  that INTEGRITY,  TRUST  &  LEADERSHIP  lead to  Happiness.  I  have  noticed  that  praise, encouragement  &  caring  create  the  space  for  building  INTEGRITY.  I  have  also experienced that when I TRUST people, they always  live  up  to  the  expectations  they  set for  themselves.  In  my  experience,  everyone wants to make a difference in the world, no matter how small that difference may be‚ so our role as LEADERS is to create the space inwhich they can realize  their potential  –  just like a conductor who does not make a single sound himself, but is all-powerful because he helps bring out the best in everyone else.

For those of you who love numbers, the latest Harvard  research  shows  that  no  more  than 10-15%  of  Happiness  is  determined  by  the external  environment  &  85-90%  is  internal to  the  person.  Events  in  our  lives  remain  the  same.  It  is  our  reaction  to  those  events that determines our level of Happiness.

The research also shows that when people are Happy, productivity goes up by over 50% and creativity by over 300%. It is a state we call “in the flow“ or “in the zone“. I can only imagine what happens to profitability when this happens on an ongoing basis. :)

The  research  from  Harvard  clearly  reaches the  conclusion  that  thinking:  “When  I  am successful,  I  will  be  happy“,  is  a  myth.  The research shows that when people are happy, they become successful & prosperous & more ethical & have higher INTEGRITY & become mentally and Spiritually richer.

The  other  good  news  is  that  happiness  is a  skill  that  can  be  learnt  just  like  football  or  piano  or  golf  and  there  is  even  a  recipe  for  everyday  Happiness.  Something  for  our “to  be“  list  as  opposed  to  our  “to  do“  list. I  always  had  a  to  do  list  till  I  realized  that  if doing was so important, we would be called Human doings – so now I have a “to be“ list and the first item on the list is – TO BE HAPPY. :)


When you get what you want 

in your struggle for self 

And the world makes you King for a day 

Just go to a mirror and look at yourself 

And see what THAT man has to say.

For it isn‘t your father or mother or wife  

Whose judgment upon you must pass

The fellow whose verdict counts

most in your life is the one staring

back from the glass.
Some people may think you  

a straightshootin’chum

And call you a wonderful guy.  

But the man in the glass says you‘re only a bum

If you can‘t look him straight in the eye.

He‘s the fellow to please, never  

mind all the rest.

For he‘s with you clear up to the end.

And you‘ve passed  

your most dangerous, difficult test.

If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world  

down the pathway of life

And get pats on your back as you pass.

But your final reward will be 

heartaches and tears

If you‘ve cheated the man in the glass.

Dale Wimbrow


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